Poker Face 3.0 Has Arrived!

Lady Gaga and RedOne are cribbing notes from Dr. Luke! We’ve got a hit song, people — let’s remix it and release it again! ‘Poker Face’ was remixed into ‘Bad Romance,’ and, judging by the snippets of the chorus leaked to us, ‘Judas’ is the latest incarnation of the original hit. This is exactly how I imagined this song sounding when I read the lyrics. Shameless.

It’s damn catchy. Of course it is: it’s ‘Poker Face.’ It will be a big hit, and while critics will point out that she, once again, has copied an old hit, nobody will give a damn.

By the way, what the fuck is that middle-eight chant?:

In the biblical sense, I am beyond repentance. ‘Fame hooker,’
‘prostitute wench,’ ‘vomits her mind.’ But in the cultural
sense, I just speak in the future tense. Judas
kiss me if offenced, Don’t wear ear
condom next time.

Um ‘offensed’ is not a word. And we can add ‘ear condom’ and ‘fame hooker’ to ‘government hooker’ in the ‘trying too hard’ department.

Apparently her label might release it to iTunes today. Let’s see if it can topple the S&M remix’s sales count in just three days in the same way that ‘Born This Way’ stormed the charts. My best guess? It probably will. Guess we’ll see…



  1. Posted April 15, 2011 at 11:35 am | Permalink | Reply

    Smh with this poor creature. Someone put her out of her misery already.

  2. Judas
    Posted April 15, 2011 at 6:52 pm | Permalink | Reply

    Leave me alone Lady Gaga I hate you.

  3. LadyBritBrit
    Posted April 15, 2011 at 9:37 pm | Permalink | Reply

    Further proof she does actually write while stoned, or whatever she calls it.
    It doesn’t make any sesne and embareses me as a songwriter to read that abysmal shit on a track,

  4. Tondi
    Posted April 18, 2011 at 9:01 am | Permalink | Reply

    “Don’t wear ear condom next time”
    That is a fucking legendary lyric.

    • steff
      Posted May 1, 2011 at 3:13 pm | Permalink | Reply

      what does this mean exactly? don’t wear ear condom next time?

  5. RetentiveT
    Posted April 24, 2011 at 12:29 am | Permalink | Reply

    You’ve returned!
    Anyway the lyrics are so givimg me a reason on how to avoid comedy when writing. I just can’t-

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